peace.

amani baby cottage,  a place of peace.

we walked into the gates of the baby cottage and a little boy with autism named mweh-ruh runs to greet us screaming and dancing for joy. come alive ABBA, your joy overflows in every corner of your creation. you are pure and perfect love. you are the helper of the fatherless. LORD you hear the desires of the humble. prepare my heart for what you have in store. open my distracted ears and may your just will be done. to the oppressed you hold them in your hands. may the earth oppress no more!

amani means peace in swahili. this is the word to describe the overwhelming feeling of these grounds. these children are loved so well. my heart was stirred up for these orphans and I feel his call. these are the least of my brothers and sisters. they have been abandoned, yet their past is behind them and they are ready to love and be loved. when they run into your arms, all you can do is kiss every inch of their little faces because they are HIS and they know it! father, I feel you tugging at my heart. reveal your will to me. i will find you when I seek you with my whole heart. here’s my heart: it lies within their smiles and their faces. it can’t help but give itself over to their needs. it cries through the distance… i love these kids because you first loved me! they look at me as if I’m as beautiful as I can be and they love me as if I could never go wrong. he’s calling the depths of my spirit as he transforms my life through these little hearts and hands.

the porch babies are the little ones. they are precious and truly adorable. when you see them, they are lovable. but I noticed one baby that was different from the rest (laying on my lap in the picture). she had thrown up all over herself and was constantly drooling and banging her head and arms back and forth. the mommas said she had autism but clearly something else was wrong with her. she couldn’t sit up straight and she was crying and cross-eyed. flies were swarming around her and no one went near her. this broke my heart. I asked one of the mommas if I could hold her and she said I would get dirty. for some reason, I heard His voice when I looked at Roquea. He gave me the grace to see her in His eyes: beautiful and his. I got a spit-up cloth and wiped her off and held her in the sunlight. she immediately was transformed, for behold the LORD makes all things NEW. she is HEMMED in his hands. she laughed and opened her mouth wide and flailed her little arms! I saw myself in Roquea. I am that little baby, helpless and imperfect. the sin in my heart is like that vomit. I am vulnerable and desperate for Him to make me clean and hold me in the Light of His glory. without Him holding me, I simply sit in the corner of that porch wallowing in separation from Him. He moved me to pick up this darling girl to show me what He does for me every day. For we did not receive the spirit of bondage again to FEAR, but we received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, ABBA, Father!! I am disabled and incapable to achieve anything without Him. he moves and breathes and is my strength and my song. he loves us perfectly. each and every one of us, throw up down our face and all. amani. a place of peace.

the peace that passes all understanding. beatrice was abandoned in a sugar cane field the day she was born. benja is a light who showed me the true heart of a servant. helene listens to your call. jonah loves to be kissed on his little tummy. jemima radiates your sweet aroma. roquea is your chosen little girl. let me be your hands and feet and love on them.